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THIS IS A TALE of two cars — the red 1988 Buick Regal LimitedCoupe and a blue model of the same name and make.

Both were assembled at General Motors’ Autoplex plant in Oshawa,Ontario. Both had low mileage at time of delivery, under 3,000 miles.

I wound up driving two Regals because of an unexpected change in thetest car schedule.

Funny, how things work out.

The red Regal was stunning — great body, great performance. Theblue Regal was a cosmetic and performance nightmare.

How can this be?

The 1988 Regal is part of the GM-10 program, a laudable effort byAmerica’s largest automaker to scrap look-alike cars and attainworld-class quality in the process.

The program mostly seems to be working. Though sharing many identicalcomponents, the GM-10 cars, including the Pontiac Grand Prix andOldsmobile Cutlass Supreme, do look different. And the cars areconsiderably better than their predecessors in overall quality anddesign.

But GM seems afraid of success. The company acts like a high schoolerwho flunks to avoid rising too far above the crowd — getting “As” and”Fs” in the same subject under the same teacher

‘Tis goofy behavior — perhaps forgivable in an adolescent, butunpardonable in a company seeking thousands of consumer dollars for itsindividual products.

C’mon GM. It’s time to grow up.

Complaint: Auto manufacturers and dealers produce and sell somelemons. We all make mistakes. Intellectually, I can accept that.Emotionally, it would be hard to live with after spending more than$15,000 for a “perfect” car.

The blue Regal coupe’s misaligned mouldings and seams in the rearcabin, its wayward alignment where the right-side interior door panel issupposed to meet the curvature of the dashboard and its erratic (surgeand hesitate) engine performance were simply unacceptable.

Praise: Kudos to the red Regal coupe, which differed from the bluecar in minor details — a “sports” steering wheel versus a”traditional” steering wheel with fake wood-grain inlay, for example.

Fit and finish on the red Regal were excellent, world class. The carwas a pleasure to sit in.

Head-turning quotient: Resembles Ford’s Taurus/Sable cars, but the1988 Regal is distinctive and attractive.

Ride, acceleration and handling: Excellent ride and handling in boththe red and the blue. Excellent acceleration in the red.

GM’s usually up-to-snuff, 2.8-liter, multiport-fuel-injected V-6 isstandard in the 1988 Regal. The engine cranks out 125 hp at 4,500 rpm.Unfortunately, in the blue Regal, the engine was just cranky.

Changes: The Regal has been changed from rear-wheel-drive tofront-wheel-drive for 1988; and the car is 8.4 inches shorter in overalllength, down to 192.2 inches from 200.6 inches in the 1987 model. Also,the new Regal is designed for easier repair and maintenance — mostmajor underhood components are easily accessible.

Sound system: AM/FM stereo radio and cassette, wi th electronic seekand scan, by GM/Delco. Excellent in the red and the blue.

Mileage: About 26 mpg in the red, versus 24 in the blue (16.6-gallontanks, estimated range of 430 in the red and 396 in the blue on usablevolume), combined city-highway, mostly driver-only, driving in theDistrict of Columbia, Maryland and Virginia.

Price: For the red Regal, $15,411, including $2,199 in options and$439 destination charge. For the blue, $14,997, including $1,785 inoptions and $430 destination charge. Base price on both is $12,782, anddealer’s invoice price on both cars (without options) is $10,617.49.