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THE 1988 BUICK Century Limited rekindles certain memories: of vanillaice cream, of a suit bought at Sears & Roebuck, of a plastic backyardswimming pool.

This car is so aggressively ordinary, it oughtta be sold by Zayre orK mart. Goodness knows, it has “blue-light special” written all over it.

Elitist thinking? Yep. Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. Elitist to themax. Why not?

Anyone who is asked to spend over $12,000 for new wheels should beuppity. That buyer should expect more than a tired rendition of lineardesign, a car of pedestrian aspiration and inspiration.

General Motors left the poetry out of the Century, and that’s toobad. It’s supposed to be a family car, and families deserve better.Something with a little personality, a little grace, a touch of styleand class.

Sure, the front-wheel-drive Century seats six in reasonable comfort.Yes, it gets you from here to there in relative safety. But driving thiscar is like having a family discussion in front of the TV.

No one really says or listens to anything. There are just blankexpressions, nodding heads, unintelligible responses.

In the Century, that conversation might go like this:

“Some kinda car, huh?”

A head nods.

“Whatcha think?”

“About what?”

“The Century?”

“The car?”

“Yeah.”

“It’s a car . . . .”

Complaints: The unrelieved boredom of it all, aggravated by themaker’s attempt to spiff up the package by adding touches of “luxury,”such as thick velour. It’s the equivalent of pink flamingos on a lawn inLevittown.

GM would’ve done better to have let this one live as a ChevroletCelebrity, which is what it is anyway.

I like the Celebrity. It’s a good, honest, basic, unpretentious,reliable family car. There’s a certain pride in that, a certain beauty.The Century, by comparison, is a twit.

Praise: Fortunately, the test model’s shortcomings in design do notaffect its fit and finish. There were no rattles, no loose plastic, nobad seams. The paint job was world-class. And the velour, though ittends to evoke a funereal mood, is top grade.

Head-turning quotient: Zip.

Ride, acceleration, handling: The test model would be better in allthree areas if it were equipped with the optional 3.8-liter, V-6 engine,the four-speed automatic transmission and GM’s top-line FE-3 suspension.

Instead, what we have here is a lackluster, 2.5-liter, four-cylinder,fuel-injected engine kicking out 98 horsepower at 4,800 rpm. Thebase-line suspension is mediocre, soft as a soap opera. Economy parts inan “upscale” car amount to built-in disappointment.

Sound system: AM/FM stereo radio, by Delco. Works okay.

Mileage: About 27 to the gallon (15.7- gallon tank, estimated414-mile range on usable volume), combined city-highway (Detroit andenvirons), running with one or two occupants and with the heater on mostof the time.

Price: $13,038, including $425 destination charge. Dealer’s invoiceprice is $10,885.02 , according to Automobile Invoice Service of SanJose, Calif.

Recommendation: The Century shares mechanicals and basic bodystructure with the Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera, which has more of a qualityfeel; the Pontiac 6000, which is more attractively designed than theCentury; and the Celebrity, a straightforward car that makes more sensethan its three stablemates. Value-conscious shoppers should consider theCelebrity first.

Recall: My column on the 1987 Audi 5000 CS Turbo Quattro, forcorrection of a typographical defect. I said the car had a 1.2-literengine. I meant 2.2 liters.