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I CAN’T SAY MUCH for the morals of thieves, but I gotta give ’emcredit for their taste in cars. I mean, let’s face it. These folksaren’t bargain hunters. They go for the good stuff — likeMercedes-Benz, Porsche, Corvette and, er, Volkswagen.

That’s right, Volkswagen. Particularly the Volkswagen GTI, whichtops the list of most-stolen, most-broken-into cars in the latest autotheft report by the Highway Loss Data Institute.

Yeah, I was shocked, too. So I called up the people at VolkswagenUnited States Inc. to get the scoop. Instead of a press release, theysent over a 1987 Volkswagen GTI 16-V.

The “V” stands for valves, four for each of the GTI’s fourcylinders. Talk about hot! This hatchback speedster can hump!

The GTI’s been around since 1983, building a good reputation amonglicit and illicit owners. But this latest iteration, with its123-horsepower engine, is something else.

Ahm, just a moment. The phone:

“Yeah, Brown here. Volkswagen? Do I still have the car? Yeah. You’dlike to get it back? Soon? Real soon? Okay, okay. Of course, I alwayslock it when I park it.”

Complaints: Drivebelt squeal at engine startup. Zapped it withWD-40.

Also, inadequate sideview mirrors: too small, too close to the car’sbody to help peripheral vision. A potential safety hazard. Surely VW cancome up with a better side-mirror package to complement the GTI’s niftysubcompact lines.

Praise: Oh my! True story: A 1987 Porsche 944 Turbo arrived at thesame time I was running around in this econo-rocket. Sexy Porsche. Redand powerful and all that. But I just couldn’t leave the GTI alone. “Funto drive” has become a hackneyed expression; the GTI restores meaning tothe phrase.

This is an exceptionally well-balanced, well-made subcompact car.The test model had 9,200 miles on it at delivery. But it was stilltight, right and rattle-free.

So many good points: a five-speed manual gearbox that shifts withalacrity, a clutch gifted with a splendid sense of timing, seats thathug four rumps with authority and affection.

Head-turning quotient: Fetching, cute little rascal.

Ride, acceleration, handling: Super small-car handling. Terrific incurves. Ride’s not at all bumpy, a la most small cars. Acceleration isfar more than what’s needed in an economy car. The GTI’s 1.8-liter,fuel-injected, double overhead cam, 4-cylinder engine kicks out 123horsepower at 5,800 rpm.

Sound system: AM/FM stereo radio and cassette, electronic seek andscan, VW “Design” model. Very good.

Mileage: About 26mpg (14.5-gallon tank, 375-mile range), combinedcity-highway, running mostly highway, driver only, and with windowsdown.

Price: $14,555, including $1,995 in options and a $320 destinationcharge; that might be called a bit of a steal, but guess who’s gettingrobbed. Base price is $12,240; dealer’s invoice price on base model is$10,500.

Tip: this model is surrounded by many worthy competitors. You haveroom to argue.